You're smart enough to see it. The relationship that starts electric and ends in the same kind of distance. The job that feels exciting for a year and suffocating by two. The way you go quiet when you're angry instead of saying something. You've journaled about it. You've read about attachment styles. You can describe the pattern perfectly. It keeps happening anyway.
That's not a failure of self-awareness. It's the difference between knowing something intellectually and experiencing it differently. You can understand exactly why you shut down in conflict and still shut down the next time it happens, because the pattern lives in your body and your reflexes, not in your understanding of yourself.
The work I do isn't about teaching you what your pattern is. You already know that. It's about catching it in the act, in the room, between us. When the pattern shows up in real time and we can both see it happening, something shifts that all the self-reflection in the world can't touch.
You don't need more insight. You need a different experience of the moment where the pattern takes over. That's what I help with.